I’ve always had trouble describing Pat to other people. I think it’s because I’ve never met anyone else quite like her. I’ve never met anyone else so absolutely stubborn, but always in the service of others. If there was something Pat could do for you, she would do it no matter what. She would spend hours on a three course meal for Friday night. She would fly across the continent for a family wedding. She would devote months to perfecting a painting for her great-granddaughters. I don’t think a selfish thought ever crossed her mind. I don’t think she actually knew how to have a selfish thought.
But what she did know, of course, was how to make people feel loved. Because to Pat, love was in the little things. There was no gesture or moment ever too small for her to let go by. Whether it was a second helping before you asked, a phone call on a special day, or a saved crossword puzzle - she never overlooked any opportunity to demonstrate that you were on her mind and in her heart. She made you feel like the centre of her universe.
To Pat, family was everything and she was so deeply a part of us it’s hard to imagine life without her. But she has left a lasting imprint in so many ways. I see her in the kindness of my mother. I see her in the resilience of my siblings. I see her in the strength of my uncles and the bonds of my cousins. I see her in the spirit of my nieces.
Over the last few years, Pat told me many times that she thought the world was broken and she hoped to live long enough to see it fixed. We know that she didn’t. But perhaps we could come a little closer to healing it if we all were stubborn in the service of others. If we all remembered that love is in the little things. If we didn’t miss any opportunity to make someone else feel like the centre of our universe.
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