Friday, June 14, 2013

Advice to My Unborn Niece

1. Don't run with scissors.
2. Try to assume the best about people.
3. When Grandpa David speaks gibberish, Granny Lynne will translate.
4. Pink does not have to be your favourite colour and Princess does not have to be your career aspiration.
5. Do your best.
6. Some people will try and tell you that Shreddies cereal is not the best thing in the world. Do not believe them.
7. Keep your promises.
8. You will want to like me the best, but will fall for Uncle Asher. That is normal and happens to everyone.
9. Ask for help.
10. Offer help.
11. Don't be one of those kids that has to shout just because they're in a pool.
12. Trust people.
13. Return the things you borrow.
14. Be nice.
15. Treat your friends well.
16. Don't step on an ant just because it's smaller than you. It's okay to step on caterpillars though, those are gross.
17. Puns are never as funny out loud as they are in your head.
18. Make eye contact.
19. It is okay to be scared sometimes.
20. Be curious.
21. Some things that are easy for you will be hard for others, and vice versa. Don't get arrogant or discouraged.
22. Don't be one of those people who leaves their garbage in movie theatres. They are the worst.
23. Be confident.
24. You can call me whenever you need me, but calls before 10am have historically had the most customer service complaints.
25. Nap.
26. Try new things.
27. Do anything for a free t-shirt. Literally, anything.
28. Read. Start with Goodnight Moon and go from there.
29. Don't ruin an apology with an excuse.
30. Smile.
31. Be nice to your parents. They love you and are just figuring all of this out.
32. Don't settle.
33. The ticklemonster is real and warrants the fear you have of him.
34. Celebrate differences, don't fear them.
35. Sing.
36. Make mistakes.
37. It's okay to act against the majority.
38. At some point, your father will want to teach you how to throw a frisbee. Let him.
39. Don't compare yourself to anyone except your past self.
40. Go on adventures.
41. Lupin is better than Sirius. That is a fact that everyone has to come to terms with eventually.
42. Being able to do a somersault is an overrated skill.
43. Double-knot your shoelaces.
44. Say "please" and "thank you." People like that.
45. Don't spoil movies for those who haven't seen them yet.
46. Laugh.
47. Be a good sport.
48. Try and figure stuff out for yourself, but if you can't, Granny Lynne has the answer.
49. Floss.
50. Everybody is making it up as they go along; you'll be fine.

PS. I'm very excited to meet you.


Erin Cerenzia said...

Auntie Shirby you are so wise. Mango is lucky to have you, as am I. xoxo Ervy - which falls in line with a ps advice to Mango: Auntie Shirby makes up the best nicknames...Embrace them.

Dani said...


Zaida Gerry said...

I just figured out #43. If someone like you had told me earlier it would have saved me a lot of grief.

Shael Fryer said...

This still chokes me up (just like the bishop and jean valjean) we need to get this printed and framed ASAP.