1. Cleaning the House of Chametz
We’ve all been cleaning anyway. This should be easy.
2. First Cup of Wine
Congrats to those who still have wine in their homes.
3. Wash Your Hands
This is what we’ve been training for!
4. Karpas
Dip your vegetables in saltwater to disinfect.
5. The Four Questions
How is this night different from all the other nights? IS THAT A JOKE?!
6. The Four Sons
If these children have two parents present, they are illegally gathering in a group of six.
7. The 10 Plagues
The 2020 Bingo list.
8. Dayenu
God, it’s enough already!
9. Pesach
Smear Purell on the doorway.
10. Matzah
Crackers are a great apocalypse snack option.
11. Marror
A preview of when all that’s left in the pantry is herbs.
12. Second Cup of Wine
Lean to the left, toward a robust social safety net.
13. Wash Your Hands
Once is not enough!
14. Charoses
Throw everything left in your kitchen in a bowl and add cinnamon.
15. Korech
Throw everything left in your kitchen in a bowl and add cinnamon and make a sandwich.
16. Dinner!
Who among us still has eggs?!?
17. Afikoman
Only hide it in/on previously sterilized surfaces.
18. Third Cup of Wine
Time to start fermenting grape juice in the bathtub.
19. Elijah
Check his temperature at the door.
20. Fourth Cup of Wine
Only two less than the daily average.
21. Next Year in Jerusalem!
Or literally anywhere outside of our homes.
Wednesday, April 08, 2020
Tuesday, May 21, 2019
Dissertation Acknowledgments
This journey began at the University of Western Ontario where Nancy Rhoden agreed to supervise the research of an overeager undergraduate student who spoke too quickly and too much. I worked with Nancy for the next three years as she patiently taught me the foundations of historical research and writing. But of all her lessons, I am most grateful for her example that scholarly rigor is not diluted, but rather strengthened, when it is coupled with kindness. While at Western, I also benefited from Rob MacDougall's mentorship. He encouraged me to think deeply about what it means to be a historian and never tired of helping me wrestle with the tough questions of work and life.
I first met Alan Taylor at the University of Windsor where I attended his talk in the fall of 2012. On my drive back to London, I got my first speeding ticket. While Alan should unquestionably reimburse me the $52 fine, my debt to him can never be fully repaid. He introduced me to liberty poles, taught me to sharpen my writing by saying more with less, and encouraged patience when fielding during Townball. His belief in me never (outwardly) wavered and I carried his confidence as a talisman during many nerve-wracking presentations and interviews. I am also immeasurably grateful to Elizabeth Varon whose unflagging support, perceptive suggestions, and good humor have greatly improved this project and my graduate school experience. Her blend of professionalism and compassion will provide the model of mentorship for the rest of my career. Gary Gallagher's wit, kindness, and enthusiasm have also enhanced my time at UVA. I am especially grateful that he has let me sully his pool table with my ineptitude. I also thank Brian Balogh, Joanne Freeman, and Sidney Milkis for the time, expertise, and encouragement they provided as members of my dissertation committee. I am honored by their involvement in this project.
In UVA's History graduate program, I found some of the smartest, kindest, and funniest people I have ever known. Their friendships have enriched this project and broadened my thinking in immeasurable ways. My small victories were sweetened and my many setbacks softened because of the people with whom I could share them. Many thanks to Kathleen Berggren, Clayton "Old Fuss" Butler, Benji Cohen, Jon Cohen, Mary Draper, Erik Erlandson, Jack Furniss, Alexi Garrett, Jesse George-Nichol, Melissa Gismondi, Connor Kenaston, Alice King, Cecilia Márquez, Brian Neumann, and Chris Whitehead. In our writing group, Jack and Melissa provided generous and thoughtful readings of my work, which challenged my thinking in all of the right ways. Our weekly meetings were among the highlights of my time as ABD and the perfect model of what a scholarly community should be.
I am very grateful to Kathleen Miller for her unfailing patience, kindness, and assistance. She always had what I needed, be it information, encouragement, or commiseration. I cannot count all of the ways Kathleen eased my path to the PhD.
Beyond UVA's History Department, a whole host of people have welcomed me into the academic community and cheered on my work and career. I hope to honor their generosity by paying it forward as best I can. Thank you to Miranda Beltzer, Charlene Boyer Lewis, Lindsay Chervinsky, Seth Cotlar, Liz Covart, James Lewis, Michael McDonnell, Paul Douglas Newman, Jason Opal, Andrew W. Robertson, Andrew M. Schocket, and Joe Stoltz. In the final year of my PhD, I formed a long-distance writing group with Kristen Beales, Jackie Beatty, and Lauren Duval. Their encouragement and ideas got me through the final stretch and it was a privilege to read their wonderful work.
Thanks also to Rachael Bell for her longstanding friendship and support (including a trip to the Dedham Historical Society!). Rachael's unyielding commitment to live and teach for a better world inspires me every day. And to Cecily Zander whose generosity, intelligence, wit, and blazers were an essential part of my final year at UVA. I also wish to thank the ladies of the Charlottesville Women's Soccer League for welcoming me with open arms and teaching me that camaraderie and competition are two sides of the same coin.
I am grateful for financial support from the following institutions: the American Philosophical Society, the Bankard Fund for Political Economy, the David Library of the American Revolution, the Dilworth Fund at the Historical Society of Pennsylvania, the Jack Miller Center, the New England Regional Fellowship Consortium, the Omohundro Institute of Early American History and Culture, the Social Sciences and Humanities Research Council of Canada, and UVA's Corcoran Department of History, Office of the Vice President for Research, the Power, Violence, and Inequality Collective, and the Society of Fellows. Thanks also to the staff at the American Philosophical Society, the Connecticut Historical Society, the David Library of the American Revolution, the Dedham Historical Society, the Historical Society of Pennsylvania, the Library Company of Philadelphia, the Massachusetts Historical Society, the National Archives, the New England Genealogical Society, the New York Historical Society, and the Small Special Collections Library at the University of Virginia. Their warmth and expertise made my time in the archives both enjoyable and fruitful.
I am also very thankful for the excellent feedback I received at several conferences and workshops over the last few years. Thanks especially to the American Political Thought Seminar at the Newberry Library, the Early America Seminar at the International Center for Jefferson Studies, the Omohundro Institute of Early American History and Culture, the Rothermere American Institute at the University of Oxford, and the Society for Historians of the Early American Republic. Thanks also to the Nau Center for Civil War History for accepting an early republic interloper so graciously.
The biggest thanks, as ever, goes to my wonderful family. I am proud to be now called a Doctor, but proudest always to be their aunt, sister, daughter, and granddaughter. I am beyond fortunate to count my siblings, Dani, Lisa, and Asher, and my siblings-in-law, Shael and Jen, as my best friends. We express our love through laughter and their senses of humor are my panacea for all of life's bumps and bruises. I am privileged to have a pair of incredible women anchoring my family at each end. The strength of my grandmothers, Pat and Rose, and the wonder of my nieces, Hallie and Avery, keeps everything in perspective.
This is a story of ordinary people who did their best in uncertain times. I tell it in the memory of my departed relatives who did the same.
This work is dedicated with immense love and gratitude to Lynne Lurie, who is a lifelong student, and David Lurie, who devotes himself fully to all he does. They have given me everything I cherish most: a close-knit family, a happy childhood, and a love of stories. Mom and Dad, your combinations of hard work with humor and curiosity with compassion are forever my inspiration.
I first met Alan Taylor at the University of Windsor where I attended his talk in the fall of 2012. On my drive back to London, I got my first speeding ticket. While Alan should unquestionably reimburse me the $52 fine, my debt to him can never be fully repaid. He introduced me to liberty poles, taught me to sharpen my writing by saying more with less, and encouraged patience when fielding during Townball. His belief in me never (outwardly) wavered and I carried his confidence as a talisman during many nerve-wracking presentations and interviews. I am also immeasurably grateful to Elizabeth Varon whose unflagging support, perceptive suggestions, and good humor have greatly improved this project and my graduate school experience. Her blend of professionalism and compassion will provide the model of mentorship for the rest of my career. Gary Gallagher's wit, kindness, and enthusiasm have also enhanced my time at UVA. I am especially grateful that he has let me sully his pool table with my ineptitude. I also thank Brian Balogh, Joanne Freeman, and Sidney Milkis for the time, expertise, and encouragement they provided as members of my dissertation committee. I am honored by their involvement in this project.
In UVA's History graduate program, I found some of the smartest, kindest, and funniest people I have ever known. Their friendships have enriched this project and broadened my thinking in immeasurable ways. My small victories were sweetened and my many setbacks softened because of the people with whom I could share them. Many thanks to Kathleen Berggren, Clayton "Old Fuss" Butler, Benji Cohen, Jon Cohen, Mary Draper, Erik Erlandson, Jack Furniss, Alexi Garrett, Jesse George-Nichol, Melissa Gismondi, Connor Kenaston, Alice King, Cecilia Márquez, Brian Neumann, and Chris Whitehead. In our writing group, Jack and Melissa provided generous and thoughtful readings of my work, which challenged my thinking in all of the right ways. Our weekly meetings were among the highlights of my time as ABD and the perfect model of what a scholarly community should be.
I am very grateful to Kathleen Miller for her unfailing patience, kindness, and assistance. She always had what I needed, be it information, encouragement, or commiseration. I cannot count all of the ways Kathleen eased my path to the PhD.
Beyond UVA's History Department, a whole host of people have welcomed me into the academic community and cheered on my work and career. I hope to honor their generosity by paying it forward as best I can. Thank you to Miranda Beltzer, Charlene Boyer Lewis, Lindsay Chervinsky, Seth Cotlar, Liz Covart, James Lewis, Michael McDonnell, Paul Douglas Newman, Jason Opal, Andrew W. Robertson, Andrew M. Schocket, and Joe Stoltz. In the final year of my PhD, I formed a long-distance writing group with Kristen Beales, Jackie Beatty, and Lauren Duval. Their encouragement and ideas got me through the final stretch and it was a privilege to read their wonderful work.
Thanks also to Rachael Bell for her longstanding friendship and support (including a trip to the Dedham Historical Society!). Rachael's unyielding commitment to live and teach for a better world inspires me every day. And to Cecily Zander whose generosity, intelligence, wit, and blazers were an essential part of my final year at UVA. I also wish to thank the ladies of the Charlottesville Women's Soccer League for welcoming me with open arms and teaching me that camaraderie and competition are two sides of the same coin.
I am grateful for financial support from the following institutions: the American Philosophical Society, the Bankard Fund for Political Economy, the David Library of the American Revolution, the Dilworth Fund at the Historical Society of Pennsylvania, the Jack Miller Center, the New England Regional Fellowship Consortium, the Omohundro Institute of Early American History and Culture, the Social Sciences and Humanities Research Council of Canada, and UVA's Corcoran Department of History, Office of the Vice President for Research, the Power, Violence, and Inequality Collective, and the Society of Fellows. Thanks also to the staff at the American Philosophical Society, the Connecticut Historical Society, the David Library of the American Revolution, the Dedham Historical Society, the Historical Society of Pennsylvania, the Library Company of Philadelphia, the Massachusetts Historical Society, the National Archives, the New England Genealogical Society, the New York Historical Society, and the Small Special Collections Library at the University of Virginia. Their warmth and expertise made my time in the archives both enjoyable and fruitful.
I am also very thankful for the excellent feedback I received at several conferences and workshops over the last few years. Thanks especially to the American Political Thought Seminar at the Newberry Library, the Early America Seminar at the International Center for Jefferson Studies, the Omohundro Institute of Early American History and Culture, the Rothermere American Institute at the University of Oxford, and the Society for Historians of the Early American Republic. Thanks also to the Nau Center for Civil War History for accepting an early republic interloper so graciously.
The biggest thanks, as ever, goes to my wonderful family. I am proud to be now called a Doctor, but proudest always to be their aunt, sister, daughter, and granddaughter. I am beyond fortunate to count my siblings, Dani, Lisa, and Asher, and my siblings-in-law, Shael and Jen, as my best friends. We express our love through laughter and their senses of humor are my panacea for all of life's bumps and bruises. I am privileged to have a pair of incredible women anchoring my family at each end. The strength of my grandmothers, Pat and Rose, and the wonder of my nieces, Hallie and Avery, keeps everything in perspective.
This is a story of ordinary people who did their best in uncertain times. I tell it in the memory of my departed relatives who did the same.
This work is dedicated with immense love and gratitude to Lynne Lurie, who is a lifelong student, and David Lurie, who devotes himself fully to all he does. They have given me everything I cherish most: a close-knit family, a happy childhood, and a love of stories. Mom and Dad, your combinations of hard work with humor and curiosity with compassion are forever my inspiration.
Monday, December 31, 2018
The Best Tweets of 2018
Sorry for the clip show.
ROBIN: the batmobile won’t start— FRO VO (@fro_vo) January 6, 2018
BATMAN: check the battery
ROBIN: what’s a tery
I have this theory that cycling is as close as a middle-class straight white guy can get to understanding Being Female. People have a reckless disregard for your safety, you have to treat everyone like they might hurt you, and if you do get hurt people will blame you for existing— Emma Hart (@Ghetsuhm) January 28, 2018
Happy Ground(hug) day! pic.twitter.com/Ee1FHT1EFO— PEANUTS (@Snoopy) February 2, 2018
Report from the field: Masculinity still in crisis. pic.twitter.com/QVTqBWrdNJ— honor sachs (@drhonor) February 7, 2018
La Croix tastes like the only soft drink they'd allow in a dystopian future where no one is allowed to have emotions— Chad Vigorous (@PrettyBadLefty) February 10, 2018
A Neutral Milk Hotel is a Complicit Milk Hotel.— Darth Vader Ginsburg (@casimerkowalski) February 19, 2018
Moses was technically the first person to download files to his tablet from the cloud.— Dire Wolf (@ADDiane) March 30, 2018
every cat falls into one of the following categories:— kimmy (@ka_waltz) April 6, 2018
• looks like it knows how to use a sword but refuses to teach you
• looks like it just finished eating an éclair
My 4 year old brought found a game in our pantry and goes “what is this?” and I go “Boggle. Want me to show you how to play?” and he goes “No, I want you to show me how to win” so I guess what I’m saying is anyone can write Aaron Sorkin dialogue.— Justin Halpern (@justin_halpern) April 24, 2018
🎶 Come with me, and you'll be,— Glenn Loury 2.0 Darker, Gayer, Different (@justabloodygame) May 6, 2018
In a world of labor violations 🎶 pic.twitter.com/STpPOlMGAm
a cat is just a dog that knows their worth— jonny sun (@jonnysun) May 16, 2018
*ska makes a comeback in 2019*— keezy (@sour_mamba) May 23, 2018
jk rowling: ron is wearing checkered vans throughout the entire 4th book
did a spider write this pic.twitter.com/UK91QFd1ck— Jon Savitt (@savittj) May 29, 2018
RACHEL MADDOW— Connor McSpadden (@connormcspadden) June 9, 2018
There's a lot going on in the news, indictments in the Trump Russia probe, the G7 summit, Chinese hackers stealing US intelligence.
But we begin tonight 4.6 billion years ago, when a myriad of comets began delivering icy payloads of water to a still cooling Earth.
It’s so fucking weird that we scrape the seed pod of an orchid into ice cream and that flavor is considered plain.— Michael Hoffman (@Hoffm) July 6, 2018
Little secret about me: my answer to the question “would you like a receipt” is based on absolutely nothing and changes all the time— Chase Mitchell (@ChaseMit) July 30, 2018
FRIEND: It's called cauliflower. It's not ghost broccoli.— Roxi Horror 💀🌸 (@roxiqt) August 3, 2018
ME: [taking a long drag on my cigarette] Listen kid, I know what I saw.
Dang who radicalized McDonald’s pic.twitter.com/yXEAJEDjEl— Mina (@maddc8) August 14, 2018
I drink sooo much water every day why do I still have so many problems— Hailey Mae Sam (@btwhaileymae) August 17, 2018
i enjoy driving and flying on planes because they both allow me to experience my unrelenting and constant fear of dying but also i get to sit down— jonny sun (@jonnysun) August 18, 2018
why is this so funny to me pic.twitter.com/fUDik7CTF5— CHELO (@chelllssseeea) August 21, 2018
Coaching dress code:— Nate Usher (@thenatewolf) November 10, 2018
Football - Dad who plays video games
Baseball - Little kid during Halloween
Soccer - Bond villain
Hockey - Things are finally looking up for old Gill. pic.twitter.com/Dta9DxDsmX
broke: debating your uncles— Kelsey D. Atherton (@AthertonKD) November 22, 2018
woke: organizing your cousins
Start writing a book. https://t.co/98YIJVJ54z— Isaac Fitzgerald🤞🏻🖤 (@IsaacFitzgerald) December 27, 2018
OH MAN I HOPE THEY RECOVERED BOTH OF THE BOOKS https://t.co/LnbKn37dhC
— Beto al-Assad (@AliceAvizandum) December 27, 2018
Tuesday, January 09, 2018
The Best Tweets of 2017
Blogger didn't save half of this post, so you only get until June. The hits of 2017 just keep on coming.
Anyway, shine on, you crazy diamonds.
I disagree w those boycotting inauguration. Many from the past fought and sacrificed to see 3 doors down live.— Luwanda (@LuwandaJenkins) January 16, 2017
Syrian women #WomensMarch London - they thought they could bury us, they forgot we are seeds pic.twitter.com/axo4op7sS6— Jill Nicholls (@JillNicholls01) January 21, 2017
If there is a Muslim ban, refugees can pretend they're Christians. You know, just like Republicans do.— Arizona Democrat (@LiterateLiberal) January 26, 2017
*considers a career in politics just so someone will call her on the phone*— Keough Novak (@KeoNovak) February 2, 2017
republicans are the true snowflakes (they're all white, they're cold, and if you put enough of em together they'll shut down public schools)— Ben Wexler (@mrbenwexler) February 7, 2017
All-You-Can-Eat Pancakes should be called Four Pancakes.— Abbi Crutchfield (@curlycomedy) January 15, 2017
this administration doesn't pass the bechdel test— Megan Amram (@meganamram) March 4, 2017
FYI, men, when a woman replies to your bullshit with a sick burn that's called getting A League of Their Owned.— OhNoSheTwitnt (@OhNoSheTwitnt) March 8, 2017
This entire shelf of own-brand cereals sounds like an old English army Major, trying to find a euphemism for gay men. pic.twitter.com/Ah7qy8LTqt— Alex Andreou (@sturdyAlex) March 16, 2017
DEBATE CAPTAIN: You're off the debate team— Nathan Usher (@thenatewolf) March 17, 2017
ME: No I'm not
DEBATE CAPTAIN: Damn. Where the hell was this guy at regionals?
Cis people: gender is biological!— Red Durkin (@RedIsDead) March 22, 2017
Also cis people: This boat is a girl.
professor gave me coins for a probability experiment and I bought a mineral water, demonstrating the chaotic components of complex systems— NOT A METH LAB (@jenlaw_11) March 30, 2017
It was the patriarchy, in the private dining room, with the glass ceiling.— Eric Rauchway (@rauchway) March 31, 2017
"Is Arthur a POC" - the greatest thread in the history of forums, locked by a moderator after 12,239 pages of heated debate,— tony (@sadvil) April 2, 2017
I like cats bc good fucking luck with them if you don't have a clear read on basic consent cues— Draw (@MostlyPregnant) April 12, 2017
The red states are lava.— Howard Mittelmark (@HMittelmark) April 18, 2017
I want a man who could fight a bear but would not for ethical reasons— Ella Gale (@hellakale) April 13, 2017
Some of the trees on the LSU campus are up to 800 years old. Isn't that incredible? They must be so ashamed of us. pic.twitter.com/ljW8AQvfRw— Lauren Duca (@laurenduca) April 25, 2017
I was arguing with my husband and my son screamed "yay! TWO christmases!" from the other room.— JennyPentland (@JennyPentland) May 6, 2017
Me from 2002: so what's 2017 like— new year, new girl (@xarexerax) May 7, 2017
Me, 2017: well, France is about 40% Nazis
02: Holy shit
17: also, that's the good news
What I find most relatable about Ernest Hemingway is that he killed himself after living in Idaho— Hailey Mae Sam (@btwhaileymae) May 11, 2017
it turns out the two hardest problems in computer science are paying women the same amount of money and showing posts in chronological order— scottish foldl (@tef_ebooks) May 28, 2017
So Trump screwed up "coverage" and then deleted it?— Kevin M. Kruse (@KevinMKruse) May 31, 2017
Isn't that his health care plan?
I believe in climate change and I don't even believe in myself— JuanPa (@jpbrammer) June 2, 2017
Wednesday, May 10, 2017
A Political Passover
Special thanks to Rachael and Melissa for their stats and encouragement.
This was the opening statement read at the start of the seder:
On Passover, we ask why this night is different from other nights. But
in the current climate, it seems a more pressing question to ask is how is this
year different from other years. One need not be the wise son to count the
ways. So tonight, as we gather together to remember that the Jewish people were
once slaves in Egypt, we thought it would be appropriate to recognize the
current struggles for freedom happening in North America and around the world.
We will dedicate each of the four cups of wine to a different group of people
whose liberty is still limited in some way. After the blessing, one person will
read a short statement before we drink that concludes with a toast for a
brighter future next Passover.
Sunday, January 29, 2017
This is 30
 |
| Almost Thirty |
Some fans may remember Ashie as the guy who won the greatest rock-paper-scissors game of all time, only to immediately destroy his prize. Others may know him from this viral video. And a handful of you are thinking of the wrong Asher. But all can agree that Asher turning thirty is about as unlikely an event as anything that has happened in 2017 (too soon?).
So in honour of this auspicious occasion, I begged Ashie to let me roast him in front of the family after his birthday dinner. I'm not saying I killed it, but even Granny Pat laughed. Here it is:
Sunday, January 01, 2017
The Best Tweets of 2016
Not every year is good. But there's something good in every year. Here are the best tweets of 2016.
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